Trust

"We're never so vulnerable than when we trust someone - but paradoxically, if we cannot trust, neither can we find love or joy”

Trust. A subject very near to my heart. I'm sure you all know that I had it pretty rough prior to coming to my Mom and Dad's house. See, people were mean to me. People threw things at me. I still can't talk about it but it has taken almost 3 years to get over most of my fears.

I still have some and I'm not sure I'll ever not cower at a loud noise. But...like my beloved brother Bear, I digress. Have you given much thought to trust? Does your dog trust you? Do YOU trust your dog?

I wish sometimes that Bear Dog, in his Last Will, had given us his trust. He sure had plenty of it didn't he? Even after he got hurt. Even in his last breath. But, alas, trust is earned and not something to be given away. Yet both of us--you and us dogs--trust, or not, and when we both trust each other it's true...our relationships are deeper and stronger.

Mom knows a guy who worked with a guy who wrote a book called, "The Speed of Trust" (by Stephen M.R. Covey). The book contends that when people choose to trust, the speed at which they do is directly proportional to how successful the relationship will be. Surely you didn’t think it worked any differently with us dogs. (and Mom will also say that those dumb horses are the same too). How can I explain it best?

When I first came home, I was scared of a lot. I was scared of my mom and dad. But every day that they were nice to me and showed me that noises aren't bad and let me get used to a routine, I started to relax. Even after I had an accident, mom never yelled. She was calm and gentle and I realized that while I was embarrassed she wouldn’t punish me for an accident. I started to trust her.

And, initially, mom kept me on a leash. I know she was scared, too; scared that I might run away. But we started to trust each other and I showed her that if she dropped the leash I would come back to her. She showed me that we when I came back to her she would shower me with love—which is what I really wanted most. I saw that Ditto and Bear trusted mom. And so I tried too. And as the days turned to weeks, I graduated from a short leash to a long leash. In turn, I played more and learned to always "check in" with mom. And, eventually I got to be off leash like Bear and Ditto. The faster we trusted the better it was.

I bet you didn't know when Bear first came to Mom and Dad’s home, he ran away. He told me that he was so scared he ran and hid (kinda like me) and Dad couldn't find him for hours. He was scared and had just been taken from the only home he knew and he didn't trust Mom or Dad. But like me, he learned to trust quickly (unlike me he was rather "treat" motivated and dad figured that out quick!), and they started to trust him, and soon it was like he'd always been there. And I really don't need to tell you the love or joy Bear and Momma had.

It's a slow process you know. Repitition. Consistency. Patience. PATIENCE. I try to tell mom that all the time. Trust is not like one of Bear's gifts which can be given and received instantly. No, trust is a slow process but like the book says, the faster you learn to trust, and allow others to trust you, the richer your relationship will be. I know you love your dogs and they love you and you both know love and joy, but do you trust each other? Have you experienced the joy that becomes so much greater? The love so much deeper?

It's hard to trust. It's scary. How do I know you won’t hurt me? How do you know I will behave? Sheesh, ask Mom about Chaudy. You have to trust yourself first, but then you have to have faith. (Remember Bear’s blog about Good Things?). Us dogs usually come pre-programmed for trust. It's not until we're hurt that we start to fear. But even we can learn to trust again. It is possible. It's harder for you to trust us. But give trust a spin. Build up some speed. You'll LOVE the ride. I promise.

Thanks for reading. It’s been awhile, and I’m sorry.

I wish happiness (and trust) to REIGN upon you today.